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Weird Al Yankovic - Girls Just Want To Have Lunch

Weird Al Yankovic - Girls Just Want To Have Lunch

Some girls like to buy new shoes -- And others like drivin' trucks and wearing tattoos -- There's only one thing that they all like a bunch -- Oh, girls, they want to have lunch -- Oh, girls just want to have lunch -- -- I know how to keep a woman satisfied -- When I whip out my Diner's Card their eyes get so wide -- They're always in the mood for something to munch -- Oh, girls, they want to have lunch -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - Stuck In A Closet With Vanna White

Weird Al Yankovic - Stuck In A Closet With Vanna White

Doctor, every night I have the strangest dreams -- Doctor, listen to me, tell me what this means -- First I'm goin' shoppin' in my underwear -- Then all of sudden I'm floating in mid air -- My lips fall off and everybody starts to stare -- Donuts and hot dogs are flying everywhere -- -- Now Doctor, wait a minute, you ain't heard nothin' yet -- Next comes the part that I won't ever forget -- Now I'm bein' followed by these Russian spies -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - Twister

Weird Al Yankovic - Twister

Yeah -- Well, Well, Milton Bradley's got a def one -- It's a Twister (Twister, Twister, Twister) -- Yeah, all the girls and homeboys -- Playin' Twister (Twister, Twister, Twister!) -- Spin the spinner and call the shot -- Twister ties you up in a knot -- That's Twister -- Yeah, Twister -- -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - When I Was Your Age

Weird Al Yankovic - When I Was Your Age

Let me tell you sonny... let me tell you straight -- You kids today ain't never had it tough -- Always had everything handed to you on a silver plate -- You lazy brats think nothing's good enough -- -- Well, nobody ever drove me to school when it was ninety degrees below -- We had to walk buck naked through forty miles of snow -- Worked in the coal mines twenty two hours a day for just half a cent -- Had to sell me internal organs just to pay the rent -- -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - Waffle King

Weird Al Yankovic - Waffle King

It took a lifetime, but I finally found -- The perfect waffle recipe -- You'll never find a batter any better in this whole stinkin' town -- One little bite and I'm sure that you'll agree -- -- Your eyes roll back and your knees get weak -- Aw, you're gonna lick your plate clean -- People come from miles around just to study my technique -- I make the best darn waffles this world has ever seen -- -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - The Night Santa Went Crazy

Weird Al Yankovic - The Night Santa Went Crazy

Down in the workshop all the elves were makin' toys -- For the good Gentile girls and the good Gentile boys -- When the boss busted in, nearly scared 'em half to death -- Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath -- From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo -- Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo -- And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye, -- "Merry Christmas to all - now you're all gonna die!" -- -- The night Santa went crazy -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - Your Horoscope For Today

Weird Al Yankovic - Your Horoscope For Today

Aquarius -- There's travel in your future when your tongue freezes to the back of a speeding bus -- Fill that void in your pathetic life by playing Whack-A-Mole seventeen hours a day -- -- Pisces -- Try to avoid any Virgos or Leos with the Ebola virus -- You are the true Lord of the Dance, no matter what those idiots at work say -- -- Aries -- The look on your face will be priceless when you find that forty pound watermelon in your colon -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - Couch Potato

Weird Al Yankovic - Couch Potato

Look -- If you had -- One shot -- To sit on your lazy butt -- And watch all the TV you ever wanted -- Until your brain turned to mush -- Would you go for it? -- Or just let it slip? -- Yo -- -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - Genius In France

Weird Al Yankovic - Genius In France

I'm not the brightest crayon in the box -- Everyone says I'm dumber than a bag of rocks -- I barely even know how to put on my own pants -- But I'm a genius in France (yeah), genius in France, genius in France -- -- Hoom chaka laka -- Hoom chaka laka -- Hoom chaka -- -- I may not be the sharpest hunk of cheese -- [more]

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Weird Al Yankovic - Weasel Stomping Day

Weird Al Yankovic - Weasel Stomping Day

Faces filled with joy and cheer -- What a magical time of year -- Howdy Ho! It's Weasel Stomping Day -- -- Put your Viking helmet on -- Spread that mayonaisse on the lawn -- Don't you know it's Weasel Stomping Day -- -- All the little girls and boys -- Love that wonderful crunching noise -- [more]

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